Is Fair Housing Flying the Co-op?
The curiosity of a socialist owning real estate inspires much teasing from my friends. But why shouldn’t I own my own home? As our comrade, Barbara Garson has proven in her book, "Money Makes the World Go Around”, unless you stuff your cash in the mattress, you are inevitably invested in evil deeds. So why not invest in an evil that you control, your home? Taking a step further, I’ve been serving on my apartment co-op’s board of directors for about a year now. For a rickety, yet charming, old building our charge is a series of uncomfortable decisions. Should we delay refurbishing the elevator, or raise the monthly maintenance charge? Paint the lobby, or give the Super a raise? I sidestepped our controversial decision to begin eviction proceedings against one of our rent controlled tenants by not having been elected to the board by that time, but I have […]
The Land Where It’s Never Christmas
The Guardian of London has a heart-warming seasonal story about a small town called North Pole in Alaska, where it’s Christmas 365 days a year and all the town’s residents (including the school children) answer “letters to Santa” that come in from around the world. Last spring, a group of about a dozen of North Pole’s sixth graders were caught “making a list and checking it twice.” Their Columbine-style massacre plot was narrowly thwarted. Perhaps the incessant holiday “cheer” drove them to it, writer Jon Ronson wonders? I was thinking about North Pole while doing some grocery shopping this morning in Kew Gardens, the Land Where It’s Never Christmas. All the shops are open as normal. Perhaps they’ll close an hour early for the big day in deference to the rest of society. There are no Santas around, the streetlights are plain and unadorned and almost no houses are decorated. […]
2006 Endorsements: Bring Back the Greens
Election time is around the corner, and I’m sure you’re dying to read my endorsements. This election, in truth, offers a rare opportunity to alter the political landscape for a progressive change. No, I’m not talking about the increasing likelihood of a Democratic sweep in New York. That is a foregone conclusion since the Republican party has collapsed under the weight of Pataki’s bland presidential ambitions and the national GOP’s right-wing extremism. The Republicans have put up scarecrows against the Spitzer and Clinton steamrollers, and are poised to lose members of their Congressional delegation and perhaps even control of the state Senate, ushering in what could become a generation of Democratic dominance in New York State. Don’t get too excited. Spitzer and the Democrats will govern from the center, and much of the tax-cutting, welfare-slashing, tuition-hiking agenda that Pataki carried out over three terms is now accepted as status quo. […]
The Little League Thief Who Was Never a Leader
The recent charges against former president of the NYC Central Labor Council, Brian McLaughlin, are incredibly disappointing. While most of his alleged embezzlement is not connected to his role as head of the local labor federation, the shocking abuse of power as an elected Assemblyman and community leader is a real black eye for the movement. (I mean, we simply do not need to be represented by the cartoonish villainy of a man who would steal $95,000 from a little league.) The tabloids, of course, are touting this as a story of a corrupt union boss, the president of the most powerful labor body in the city. The sad truth is that Brian McLaughlin was a weak leader, totally beholden to the building trades who pursued the lowest common denominator agenda that couldn’t unite the various union locals that make up the council to support each other’s strikes and contract […]
Still More Turkeys
I just got yet another $400 check from Mayor Mike to thank me, the Finance Commissioner says, “for keeping New York City strong during difficult times.” Well, gosh, I try. But I’m still not voting Republican.
Mall Strike!
For years I’ve wanted to picket a shopping mall. Low wages, tacky store names urban sprawl and poor design are the crimes that leap immediately to mind. Add union-busting to the mix. At the Simon mall chain, which owns the Walt Whitman, Smith Haven, Source and Roosevelt Field malls here on Long Island, the employees of the firms that are subcontracted to clean the malls are members of the janitors union, Local 32BJ – all except for the food court cleaners. Now they too are organizing to join the union and are facing the typical barrage of threats, harassment and intimidation. The federal government’s National Labor Relations Board has ruled that management’s activities are illegal Unfair Labor Practices, and on Friday the union will stage a one day strike to protest this illegal activity. There will be a rally on Friday the 15th at 5:30 PM at the mall entrance […]
Things Overheard on the First Day of College
1. “Dude, our dorm is, like, the loudest dorm on campus. We were playing Blink 182 really loud all night long.” 2. “Excuse me. Can you tell me where room L77 is?” 3. “So, my mom called me this morning at, like, a quarter to seven, and she’s like, ‘I just want to know how your first day of school was,’ and I was like, ‘Mom, give me some space.’” (Whining italicized.) 4. “Is room L77 in the basement?” 5. “They’re selling dorm posters by the bus stop. I got this cool ‘Scarface’ poster.” “Cool.” 6. “Are you looking for room L77, too?” 7. “Cute shoes. Are you a biology major?” 8. “If we can’t find room L77, does that mean that class is cancelled?”
More Notoriety
You can’t even pump your gas in this town without people interviewing you for a newspaper article (See next to last paragraph). A YELLOW LIGHT FOR POLICE’S RACE PLAN Experts and LI drivers say Suffolk police should proceed with caution in project to record race of those stopped for traffic violations BY JENNIFER MALONEY Newsday Staff Writer July 12, 2006 Law enforcement experts and Suffolk residents reacted with skepticism yesterday to the Suffolk police department’s plan to gather data as a check against racial profiling. The opinions came a day after Suffolk police said they are recording the race of drivers stopped on the Long Island Expressway and Sunrise Highway for routine traffic violations in an effort to document if cops are profiling residents by race. The department, which began the initiative about two months ago and will continue for the next six to 12 months, hopes the data gathered […]
Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman
Given my relentless campaign to promote “the Q” (that’s the totally rad nickname that all the hipsters will soon be calling my neighborhood, Kew Gardens), I was delighted to find that Hollywood produces blocked off much of the intersection of Austin St. and Lefferts Blvd. this past weekend to shoot scenes for Spiderman 3 (there’s already a teaser trailer, even though the movie won’t be out until next summer). Hopefully, Spidey will swing past the Kew Gardens Cinema slowly enough for viewers to admire the fine selection of independent and art house flicks being offered, grab a knosh from Baker’s Dozen (which Alan Amalgamated promotes as “Scrumptious Bagels” – oh, yeah, he’s on “the Q” team!) and land for a slice at Dani’s House of Pizza. That way, next summer, throngs of movie fans will swarm to “the Q,” and raise the property value of my own real estate empire. […]
Worst. Park Name. Ever.
The charming statue of an befuddled capitalist foot soldier, who had gone missing like so many other men in ties with attache cases after 9/11, has returned to the former Liberty Plaza around the corner from Ground Zero. The park is now named after one John E. Zuccotti. Who the fuck is John E. Zuccotti, you ask? Is he a fireman who died that day, or perhaps a waiter at Windows on the World or a stockbroker at Cantor Fitzgerald? The classic comedic duo George Pataki and Dan Doctoroff revealed all in a high-larry-us send-up of award ceremonies at yesterday’s unveiling: “In the category of New Name for a Refurbished, 26-Year-Old Park,” Mr. Doctoroff began, “the winner is – ” ” – the winner is,” Mr. Pataki continued, “the chairman of Brookfield Properties, the chairman of the Real Estate Board of New York, the former first deputy mayor of the […]